Love, Secret Friends and Jealousy

f you really love someone, you wish to possess this person, to share a unique relationship with them and never have rivals.

Of course, you feel jealous when someone special is near the person you love, especially if you cannot be there or if you are afraid that they may be "secret friends"...

If you know that you have many rivals because the person you love is also loved by many others, then you are always suffering when a rival appears near him or her.

Things are worse when you don't have a relationship with the person you love... yet.

But even if you are together, the existence of many rivals is not pleasant.

Perhaps you are the kind of person who is really too jealous, even without reason.

In any case, we must do something about this problem, because jealousy makes you suffer and on the other hand, when you show to the person you love how jealous you are, you are revealing your weakness, and this is not a good thing.

You must control your behaviour and never show your jealousy, even if you are very jealous because if you'll show your weakness you may be ridiculed or manipulated.

On the other hand, if they know that you are jealous, they will never show you a sign of anything that might upset you because they are afraid of your reaction. Be cool. Don't panic only because someone you hate is saying hello to the person you love. Even if you feel very bad, don't reveal your feelings. You have to hide this feeling, so that the person you love feels free with you and shares everything with you.

However, you must get rid of this feeling, and not only hide it forever.

No matter how many times you can be near your love and prevent certain meetings with other people, you cannot be always near him or her, even if you are married. Therefore, you have to be self-confident. You must trust your companion and feel secure even when a thousand rivals appear in your way.

Trust the person you love. Stop torturing yourself with suspicious thoughts and simply feel fine, and believe that he or she is loyal and loves you as much as you love him or her.

However, keep an eye out for any signs. You can always pay attention to all details, just in case something happens but you never notice it because you were too confident.

Be confident but don't be naïve.

You must show indifference to all your rivals, especially in front of the person you love. This way they will never have the idea of provoking your jealousy... because you don't care.

You should really be self-confident and never believe that your lover has "secret friends," but if you can't be that indifferent, at least pretend.

On the other hand, don't overdo it! Show to your love that you care for him or her of course! Show him or her that you noticed that somebody else has another intention and you didn't like it if this is the case. You are not silly and you are not indifferent to your lover!

However, be cool. Simply express a normal level of jealousy when necessary but keep an attitude of total indifference to all the rivals you may have most of the time, because this is the best for you.

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Men and Women - The Difference

For thousand of years, men and women have shared the planet Earth. They have raised families, worked, enjoyed good times and endured hardships together. Yet, in most places and at most times in history, women have been treated differently from men. Sometimes they have been cared for and protected. More often, they have been viewed as mere possessions or despised as inferiors. Why is this?

Charles Darwin theorized that women were intellectually inferior to men. His contemporary, Gustave Le Bon, viewed them as "the most inferior forms of human evolution." Few today would admit to such opinions. Nevertheless, women and men are different. In what ways? And does this mean that one is inferior to the other?

Physical Differences

Some of the physical differences between men and women are evident. Women are designed to be mothers, men to be fathers, and the structures of their bodies reflect this fact. But there are other differences.

Ï In almost every country, women live to an older age than men. At the very beginning of life, 130 boys are conceived for every 100 girls. Nine months later, more male embryos than female have failed to survive, so that 106 boys are born for every 100 girls. By the time they grow to be teenagers, girls come to outnumber boys.

Ï Men athletes have larger and more muscular shoulders and arms. They also have bigger and stronger legs, and bigger hearts and lungs. Thus, in most events men outperform women. Yet women athletes have abdominal muscles that can be as strong as those of men. Although women perspire less copiously, their sweat glands are better distributed and their perspiration is more efficient-a help for endurance. Stored body fat gives them a greater buoyancy in water and greater endurance, so that women dominate the sport of long-distance swimming.

Hence, it seems that, physically, men have the edge in strength, while women have the edge in endurance. What about other differences?

Other Differences

Do men and women think differently? This is a sensitive subject, since many feel that wrong ideas in this area have led to women's being oppressed. Nevertheless, many researchers feel that there are differences.

Ï Girls usually become more skillful with their hands than do boys. They speak earlier and more fluently and come to be better at languages. They are often better at memorizing and intuitive thinking. Women often handle detailed and routine work more efficiently than do men.

Ï Boys grow up to be better at mathematics, mechanics and analytical thinking. They are also better at spatial organization and perception.

Ï Many women feel they cannot control their emotions as well as men-although some deny this.

Of course, these differences are not rigid. There are men who are good at languages, and there are women who excel at mathematics. Anyone who has watched a nurse during a medical emergency knows that women are not entirely controlled by their emotions. Many work coolly and efficiently under pressure. And how many men are always cool, logical and self-controlled?

What causes the differences? Many feel we are made differently inside as well as outside. They say that male or female hormones make a person's brain-not only the body-function in a manly or a womanly way. Others insist that differences between men and women are caused by the way boys and girls are brought up. Still others see an interplay between the two: the different ways in which boys and girls are treated reinforce the effect that hormones have on the brain. Whatever the reason, differences do exist.

Consequently, women have not always been treated well. They have often been exploited, and their freedom has been greatly limited.

Frankie Goh is a family counselor and researcher.

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Unconditional Love Is Loving Without Attachment

There are many kinds of love but all love that is true is different expressions of the same love which is God's love. Whatever love that you feel and express, it is actually the love of the creator being expressed through you. Who you really are is a messenger of God's love. Life is a journey for us to discover more of who we really are so that we can evolve to higher forms of expressing love until we can fully love unconditionally. That is when we can fully allow the love of the divine to flow through us uninhibitedly.

Unconditional love is love that is free. You are never really free to love when you have attachments that keep you from loving freely. You hold back from expressing love because of rejection, you hold back from expressing love because it is not reciprocated. When you allow yourself to love unconditionally, you are not afraid of rejection. You love fearlessly and freely without needing anything back. The most liberating kind of love is the carefree kind of love. It is giving of yourself freely and not holding back.

When you love unconditionally, you are simply following your heart while having detachment from results. Conditions are attachment to results. You may desire to have things go a certain way with someone or something. But when you unconditionally love and accept what is, even if it does not happen the way you intend it to happen, then you create the conditions by which the essence of what you truly desire can happen because it is no longer a requirement for it to happen, but it is free to spring forth.

Loving unconditionally is loving with acceptance and not requiring change. Sure you might desire positive change but it does not change your love if it doesn't happen. Even when negative change happens, it still doesn't stop you from loving. It is being willing to love even if never rewarded, because the love itself is its own happiness. When others love you unconditionally, they love you just as you are. It is the most beautiful kind of love that you can experience because that's when you are truly loved.

The fullest unconditional love is not only loving you as you are but it is also loving all that you are. It is even loving your entire world. When someone loves you totally, they love all that you are and they even love your entire world. They seek to express love not only to you, but to everything that is a part of your world. Such fullness of love on Earth is meant to be experienced between two soul mates created for each other. They love each other more than anyone else, and they love each other to that extent.

When you do anything with love, you are doing for the joy of expressing what's within and not for results. It is like when you are passionate about something and are just doing it because you love doing it and not because you want to achieve anything. You may desire results or achievement but that is not your primary motivation. You will still continue to do what you do even when nothing else happens. Your actions are internally driven and not externally driven. You are just letting your heart guide you fully.

When you love with unconditional love, you love with the purest motive of desiring the highest good for the other. You may have certain beliefs about what would be best for that person, but you are willing to let go of your wishes if the universe has something else in mind for them. You do not enforce what you think they should have, but you surrender to the will of the creator. You desire what's truly best for them even though it may not be what you originally thought it was. After all that is what you really want.

No matter what happens, you keep on loving and never stopping. You continue to persist in your loving not because you have to but because you are just staying true to yourself. You know that the love is always there and so you don't hide or run away from it when things don't seem to work out. When you choose to be authentic, there is simply no other way to live but to give the love that you always have to give. You already know you can never stop loving therefore you just surrender to the love completely.

Express unconditional love towards the one you love, and everything you do. The way you love is the way you live. Give yourself fully towards all that you love and accept whatever results you get with gratitude knowing that all is in divine order and is working together for your highest good. You may be insistent, purposeful and fully intentional in your actions and communication, but at the same time you are detached from the outcome. You are free of expectations and simply flow with the universe.

True love never fails. Unconditional love is the whole secret of the law of attraction with detachment. It is also the law of God action and acting from spirit. When you act with these three laws of the universe, you can never fail to create what you truly desire which is according to your highest good. Unconditional love is simply God in action. When you follow your heart and act according to your highest intentions, you are serving the divine within. We are all here to do God's work, which is to express his love.

The greatest love of all is unconditional love. It is also perfect love because it allows you to act from love and not fear. All fear based actions is the result of attachment to outcome and not trusting the divine. Perfect love is fearless. We do not have to love because love is already present. We just have to realize it and allow it to be expressed through us. Unconditional love is only possible when you love God more than any other. You trust the universe completely. Loving God is loving yourself with the best love.

Enoch Tan aims to help people achieve greater awareness in living and experiencing life. To evolve human consciousness to higher levels. To change lives and transform the universe. To revolutionize the way we understand the mind and reality. Because that is what governs every area of life and destiny. Get Free Ebooks of The Most Powerful Knowledge and Learn Secrets of Mind and Reality That will Fully Benefit You Now at: Secrets of Mind and Reality

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